“Some kind of vague narrative on the nature of celebrity” or “Why I think Gok wan is an android”
Gok wan, surely has to be, the strangest celebrity phenomenon in decades.
Here are a collection of reason I question the validity of his actual human form.
- I was first suspicious when I realized his “early life” section on Wikipedia reads like a poorly written blurb for a modern day rags to riches tale. Once a assumingly bonofied fashion consultant, wan has spent the last 10 years becoming an industry expert on just about anything he can be vaguely related to.
- The Pr that surrounds this man is as thick as a nuclear mushroom cloud, Nothing about Gok Wan seems unintentional. it sometimes feel as though somewhere there’s a giant paper pad sitting in a board room at channel four with the words BUBBLLY, SENSITIVE, and GLASSES… Possibly in a bubble labbelled “tactics”…
- His desperation to get everyone, of all ages and statures, naked… I’m not really sure what to back this up with other then im pretty sure that what androids are up to most of the time.
- He only have 3 facial expressions, real humans are known for having fairly opposable occipitofrontalis muscles and are infact capable of quite a few representations of emotion.
A quick google image such will educate you in what I have come to know as “the trinity”
A)
B) C)

Figure A) The side smile most commonly used, possibly a ploy to sell his range of questionably priced glasses.
Figure B) The exorcist It seems in an attempt to make someone (whos job it to force fairly young venerable people to undress) look less creepy, Gok wan has been instructed (programmed) to constantly smile. This way people will find him less threatening and further more will be more obliged to be exploited.
Figure C) The turn and smurk Mainly used after said exploitation has happened.
You see its important you realize, im not saying I think Gok wan is a bad person, Im simply saying, Im not sure he is a person atall.
xoxo
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plicka likes this
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betty--poop said:
hey he’s just tryna make ladies and gents feel good about themselves naked its not that bad. he’s just some no name dude that got pulled out of shit jobs because of his looks and he must take direction well enough to work for tv
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derpunicornmermaid reblogged this from popiatom and added:
This Blew my mind.
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